In Erickson's Stages of Psychosocial Development, his fifth stage of Identity vs. Role Confusion, truly defines what's going on during this time in a person's life. In adolescence, we begin to develop different identities other than the identities of our family members, and try to understand our true sense of self, who we are, what we stand for, and what we want to do with our lives. As we experience different things we learn something new about ourselves that helps us better understand our identity. This is a lifetime process in learning who we are or as Erickson says, is a "forever-to-be-revised" sense of self.
Growing up I always wanted to have and/or do things that was different from everybody else. I was the first person in my school to get their navel pierced when my mom took me at the young age of 13. Followed by the peircing of my tongue at 14. By getting peircings I was in my own way expressing myself. I never followed a particular crowd and got along with all kinds of different people and personalities. I don't remember ever spending that much time withdrawing into my bedroom which I guess is a common habit performed by teens. During my teenage years I was extremely angry and I'm very thankful I found a way to channel that anger through sports. If I didn't have my school soccer and track teams I really doubt I would have graduated high school because I wouldn't of had to maintain a certain GPA in order to participate in any extracurricular event.
I feel every teenager should participate on some sort of team whether it be a sports team or math olympiad. By doing this we have to trust the people around us and accept our peers as people we can have faith in, which all adolescents look for and need during these crucial years of puberty and in finding their own identities. By performing on a team I believe it will make the path towards finding the identity we all look for as a teenager somewhat easier and also more fullfilling.
Tuesday, October 30, 2012
Monday, October 22, 2012
Parenting Styles
I love how the content of this Lifespan Psychology course continues to intrigue me. With each new subject I learn a variety of different subjects relating to human development that I never knew before. In Chapter 7 of our text I was shocked to find out that there was actually names for the different styles of parenting. I knew from watching parents with their children that not everyone has the same ways of discipline or ways of expressing emotions with their children but to actual know there were labels is pretty fascinating.
I wish every parent was required to take a parenting or human development class. This would improve the quality of our children's lives for generations to come. I know we would all like to think we fall under the authoritative parenting style which combines a fair degree of parental control with being warm and responsive to children. Authoritative parents also explain rules and encourage discussion. What parenting style do you think you fall under?
Personally, I am really good at explaining to my children why I don't want them to do something or why they are in trouble. If I notice my child isn't happy about something whether it's regarding my decision or something that might have happened at school I patiently encourage conversation about feelings and solutions. Most of all I have a very positive demeanor that tends to make hard situations a little lighter. Sometimes I fall under the authoritarian parenting style which combines high control with little warmth. These parents lay down the rules and expect them to be followed without discussion. Sometimes, if I have said what needs to be said then I expect no more argument. As a single mother that works and goes to school, it can be hard to not slip into this category when I don't feel like explaining my decisions or when I don't think before overreacting about a mess and handling it in the wrong way.
From reading this material I learned that most parents fall under more than 1 category throughout life and as children age our parenting styles have to change and alter and grow around them. All I know is that I'm going to keep being the best parent I know how to be.
I wish every parent was required to take a parenting or human development class. This would improve the quality of our children's lives for generations to come. I know we would all like to think we fall under the authoritative parenting style which combines a fair degree of parental control with being warm and responsive to children. Authoritative parents also explain rules and encourage discussion. What parenting style do you think you fall under?
Personally, I am really good at explaining to my children why I don't want them to do something or why they are in trouble. If I notice my child isn't happy about something whether it's regarding my decision or something that might have happened at school I patiently encourage conversation about feelings and solutions. Most of all I have a very positive demeanor that tends to make hard situations a little lighter. Sometimes I fall under the authoritarian parenting style which combines high control with little warmth. These parents lay down the rules and expect them to be followed without discussion. Sometimes, if I have said what needs to be said then I expect no more argument. As a single mother that works and goes to school, it can be hard to not slip into this category when I don't feel like explaining my decisions or when I don't think before overreacting about a mess and handling it in the wrong way.
From reading this material I learned that most parents fall under more than 1 category throughout life and as children age our parenting styles have to change and alter and grow around them. All I know is that I'm going to keep being the best parent I know how to be.
Wednesday, October 17, 2012
Americans Depend on Them
I was extremely disturbed by the article, "The Migrant Child." The information alone is enough to touch anyone but I was more upset at myself for being so naive. I'm sure I'm not the only one that takes where our food comes from for granted. Just a trip to the grocery store and we've got what we want for a snack or a meal to feed our families.
Americans depend on migrant farmworkers for the economy of agriculture. If we depend on them for the majority of our fruits and vegetables, then why are they the most neglected groups of our nation's poor? A typical migrant family earns less than $5,000 per year, according to Young Children, (2001). Way to show our appreciation, huh? I had no idea there were still families in this day and age that work so hard with little to no help from their communities.
Since migrant farmworks have to move so much in order to follow the crops, the migrant farmchildren are the ones who suffer the most. The article says, "When children's homes keep moving and are determined by changing employment, their development can suffer. And constant moving may contribute to feelings of mistrust and isolation in young children. They may have difficulty forming attachments with other children and adults." This goes back to earlier topics we've covered, trust vs. mistrust and secure attachments. I agree 100% that childrens abilities to trust and form attachments are critically impacted by the constant moving and never knowing where they'll end up or how long they'll be able to stay in a certain place.
The constant uncertainty of a migrant child's life is unfathomable. I can't imagine the cycle of poverty, or the poor health and education of migrant families ever changing if they remain invisible and we, as Americans, remain conveniently unaware.
Americans depend on migrant farmworkers for the economy of agriculture. If we depend on them for the majority of our fruits and vegetables, then why are they the most neglected groups of our nation's poor? A typical migrant family earns less than $5,000 per year, according to Young Children, (2001). Way to show our appreciation, huh? I had no idea there were still families in this day and age that work so hard with little to no help from their communities.
Since migrant farmworks have to move so much in order to follow the crops, the migrant farmchildren are the ones who suffer the most. The article says, "When children's homes keep moving and are determined by changing employment, their development can suffer. And constant moving may contribute to feelings of mistrust and isolation in young children. They may have difficulty forming attachments with other children and adults." This goes back to earlier topics we've covered, trust vs. mistrust and secure attachments. I agree 100% that childrens abilities to trust and form attachments are critically impacted by the constant moving and never knowing where they'll end up or how long they'll be able to stay in a certain place.
The constant uncertainty of a migrant child's life is unfathomable. I can't imagine the cycle of poverty, or the poor health and education of migrant families ever changing if they remain invisible and we, as Americans, remain conveniently unaware.
Monday, October 8, 2012
The difference between boys and girls??
The article, "What's the difference between boys and girls?" fascinated me! I'm sure I loved reading it because I have two children, one of each sex. I get to witness what is so called, "gender appropriate," and what isn't, every day.
My son Darius, who is 5, has always been an extremely rambunctious child. We own every Hotwheel imaginable and Power Ranger toys can't be manufactured fast enough. My son is a boy to the max down to his core, no questions asked, until... he asks to watch a Barbie movie or wants me to draw him a picture of Strawberry Shortcake. In the article, Deborah Blum's son asks for a Barbie, well, so has Darius, although for different reasons than chopping off her head. I ended up buying him a Ken doll that he only played with for 5 minutes. I have to admit, like most parents, I hesitated to buy him a "gender inappropriate" toy. In the end it came down to one question, who am I to decide what toy is right or wrong for my child to play with? Because media says so? Because our culture says so? No. A child is only a child for so long, innocent from the gender restrictions yet to be put on him by his peers and what they say is socially acceptable.
My daughter, Tamaya, who is almost 18 months, has also been a very energetic child from the minute she was born. Tamaya is very vocal but I guess when a girl wants something she doesn't hesitant to let it be known. I always wonder if Tamaya would have turned out different if she didn't have an older brother to look up to. She will tackle him to the ground and wrestle with him before she picks up any type of doll. I am shocked at how tough that girl is already! I was a tomboy growing up so my next question is this...Is she ramunctious because she has an older brother or because its in her genes? I think both.
I have found that Darius needs more one-on-one attention where as Tamaya will do what she wants and is stubborn in her ways without as much guidance. Like Deborah said, "We can influence our children...not by force, but by guidance."
My son Darius, who is 5, has always been an extremely rambunctious child. We own every Hotwheel imaginable and Power Ranger toys can't be manufactured fast enough. My son is a boy to the max down to his core, no questions asked, until... he asks to watch a Barbie movie or wants me to draw him a picture of Strawberry Shortcake. In the article, Deborah Blum's son asks for a Barbie, well, so has Darius, although for different reasons than chopping off her head. I ended up buying him a Ken doll that he only played with for 5 minutes. I have to admit, like most parents, I hesitated to buy him a "gender inappropriate" toy. In the end it came down to one question, who am I to decide what toy is right or wrong for my child to play with? Because media says so? Because our culture says so? No. A child is only a child for so long, innocent from the gender restrictions yet to be put on him by his peers and what they say is socially acceptable.
My daughter, Tamaya, who is almost 18 months, has also been a very energetic child from the minute she was born. Tamaya is very vocal but I guess when a girl wants something she doesn't hesitant to let it be known. I always wonder if Tamaya would have turned out different if she didn't have an older brother to look up to. She will tackle him to the ground and wrestle with him before she picks up any type of doll. I am shocked at how tough that girl is already! I was a tomboy growing up so my next question is this...Is she ramunctious because she has an older brother or because its in her genes? I think both.
I have found that Darius needs more one-on-one attention where as Tamaya will do what she wants and is stubborn in her ways without as much guidance. Like Deborah said, "We can influence our children...not by force, but by guidance."
Monday, October 1, 2012
Sense of Self
First of all, I chose this article to respond to because I can really relate and connect with the information on a personal level.
Everyone has their own set of genes that they inherit from their parents that gives them certain personality and behavior traits. I strongly believe that the environment around you shapes what genes will take control and which ones will take a back seat throughout life, or in other words be dominant or recessive. A child would be a totally different person if raised in a small town in , let's say, South Dakota then if he/she were raised in New York City.
When Thomas Hayden says, "The child's genes often set the tone of parenting, parents behavior reflects genetic differences in their children." This is so true. My five year old son is an extremely rambunctious boy who has always been a handful. I have tried everything as far as discipline goes and nothing seems to get through to him. If you approach an overly impulsive child with a frustrated attitude, it's not going to solve anything. I changed my whole approach on how I was disciplining him and my methods, as well as his behavior have improved dramatically.
I get down on his level and I give him a few choices and tell him what happens is up to him. He has the option of choosing to pick up his mess, (the reason why hes in trouble in the first place), he can go in the corner until hes ready to come talk to me about what he's done and what hes going to do to fix it, or he can go lay down. I believe this method helps children learn how to self regulate their behavior by having them decide a just punishment.
The Sense of Self, by Thomas Hayden identifies that if the metabolism of the brain chemical serotonin is lower than normal, the individual will demonstrate impulsiveness, risky behavior, and bursts of rage. My son displays all of these characteristics at some point or another throughout the day.
Since my son exhibits these behaviors is he more prone to depression and alcoholism? Both of the illnesses have been linked to lower than average serotonin levels.
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